Dear J.
I can definitely relate to that! I never wanted to integrate either and never made an attempt to do so. It happened anyway on our own. But whether you choose to become one or stay as many, communication is a necessity. My internal system was a democracy. I've heard others that did OK with a benevolent dictatorship. Whatever works for the group. Maybe you could hold elections or at least put out a question and see what each wants. Cooperation and communication are very important. How do problems get resolved if no one is willing to deal with them? Don't they get worse? Or does each handle whatever they do best in which case, that sounds like a plan in itself. Does everybody get listened to? Did they give up because no one is listening? Been there, done that. Things get sooo... much better when the communication lines are open, a bit noisy sometimes but much better.
H.B.
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Dear J.
I wish I had some good ideas for you. The best I can come up with is to write, draw, or talk your thoughts and feelings into a recording device. Then review what you put down, over and over. Be kind to your selves during this process. No name calling, though you may have to deal with other aspects of yourself calling you names. If that happens, be polite, and apologize for causing distress. Over time, all of you will slowly begin to experience communal friendship and partnership feelings again. My guess is, your internal communicating will probably return.
I hope others have ideas for you, too.
Best wishes,
Lynn W.